The Power of Questions
I recently did a personality assessment on myself as part of my masters.
I was due to do a piece on either perfectionism, narcissism, or risk-taking and its relation to performance.
But my tutor sent out what he called a “gauntlet challenge” to ask the question. “Who am I?”
And I chose: “Who am I in relation to perfectionism?”
“It’s a seminal question” he stated.
And it is.
It sent me off to read up on where my perfectionism stemmed from and what I could do about it.
It was an incredibly cathartic process that brought about some eye-opening insight.
Needless to say, I not only did well on the assignment, but it sparked my interest in the area of perfectionism.
It has inspired me to do my research project around the topic.
So why did I find it so interesting?
It was not just because of what I found but also because of the questions I was having to ask.
And with my clients, who are athletes, businesses, and students. I always see it as “just asking questions.” Some of my best podcasts come from ‘asking good questions.
The trouble is most people don’t ask themselves questions for perhaps a few reasons:
- Reluctant to challenge
- Fear of not wanting to address the issue
- Not having the confidence in their ability to address the answer
Yet when we ask questions, we open the opportunity to:
- Spark change
- Uncover solutions
- Challenge our current beliefs
- Create a more focused approach
- See things from a new perspective
At the it’s heart, the ability to ask is Curiosity
I recently listened to Chris Williamsons podcast with Dr Robert Waldinger on happiness.
Dr. Waldinger quoted a study on relationships that found people who upheld curiosity in the relationship had better relationships due to being more attuned to each other and not making assumptions about each other.
Keeping up the “freshness” of the relationship.
We can say the same for ourselves.
Being curious about ourselves and where we currently are at, attunes us to life.
It keeps us from getting caught in our own assumptions or going through the motions.
So asking questions allows us to view, evaluate, and adapt to our current situation.
The importance of asking good questions
If we ask good questions, we get good answers.
It’s as simple as that.
We can then start to incorporate this into our everyday lives.
Something I’ve learned from podcasting and relationships is that the most interesting and meaningful ones come from good questions.
Think about going on a date with someone, spending a night with your partner, or spending an evening with friends.
People find you interesting when you ask them good questions, and chances are they’ll ask them back!
You’ll build better, deeper connections with others and have memorable experiences.
So why not ask yourself deeper questions too?
So for today, here are a couple of questions to get yourself going:
- Am I currently happy with the way I do 70% of my life?
- What could I be doing to improve my life?
- What’s could I do, that I would do, to change things right now?
The foundation of any academic writing or study is to find a question worth asking and that you want the answer to.
Do the same for your life too.
Because if there’s anything I want you to take from this article, it’s this:
The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions
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